POSH
What To Do If Your Child Is Being Groomed
You don’t need perfect proof to act carefully.
If something feels wrong, slow the situation down and protect your child.
First — stay calm
Your reaction matters more than you think.
If you panic, your child may shut down or hide more.
If you stay calm, your child is more likely to stay open.
Calm action protects more than emotional reaction
What grooming can look like
Grooming rarely starts obvious. It usually builds slowly.
- Someone giving attention, compliments, or support
- Moving chats into private apps
- Encouraging secrecy
- Building emotional dependency
- Testing boundaries slowly
- Creating pressure, guilt, or fear
What to do right now
Stay calm
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Slow the situation down
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Keep your child talking
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Check safely
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Take action if needed
You are not trying to catch your child out. You are trying to understand what is happening.
Step 1 — Keep your child talking
Your child may feel confused, embarrassed, or scared.
Do not blame them
Do not shame them
Do not jump straight to punishment
Do not make them feel like they caused the situation
The safer your child feels talking to you, the more information you will get.
Step 2 — Slow the situation down
- Reduce contact without making it obvious if possible
- Delay replies instead of reacting instantly
- Avoid confrontation with the other person immediately
- Keep control of the situation on your side
Slowing things down gives you time to understand before reacting.
Step 3 — Check safely
Look at the situation without turning it into a fight.
- Review messages, apps, and contacts calmly
- Look for movement between platforms
- Check usernames, profiles, and behaviour patterns
- Watch emotional reactions to specific people
Step 4 — Save evidence
Take screenshots
Save usernames and profiles
Record platforms used
Note dates and patterns
Do not delete evidence before saving it
Step 5 — Take action if needed
If there are signs of grooming, manipulation, threats, or sexual content, act.
- Block or restrict the person when safe to do so
- Report through the platform
- Report to relevant authorities if serious
- Get support for your child
What NOT to do
Do not panic in front of your child
Do not immediately delete accounts or messages
Do not confront the person without a plan
Do not punish your child first
Wrong reactions can push the situation deeper underground
What your child may be feeling
- Confused
- Embarrassed
- Scared
- Guilty
- Attached to the person
- Unsure what is happening
Your child may not see it as danger yet — even if it is.
Why early action matters
Grooming builds over time. Acting early can stop escalation.
Early concern
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Understanding
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Controlled response
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Reduced harm
Final POSH reminder
You are not overreacting by checking.
You are not wrong for trusting your instinct.
You do not need full proof to act carefully.
Act earlier. Stay calm. Protect your child.